Okay. So my com decided to do 'its' thing on me again by disconnecting the connection when I have already typed out my entry. So now, I have to retype everything. Nevermind, it's okay Athirah.
Okay put that aside once and for all. Finally, done with Mt O-level. Such a big deal, wasn't it? I'm free, free like a bird flying. NOT! Ha-ha, I'm only free of Mt O-level, teachers and waking up early. But other than that, I'll still have to go to school for extra classes and revisions for other O-level subjects. I think I need to start my intensive revision. Okay, bubble bubble bubble. Don't think I will, as usual. I'm so easily demotivated. Oh man I really need my ice caramel, I'm so craving for it. Wait. Why am I talking about drinks when I am supposed to blog about studies and the need to pull up my socks. Oh man I need some colours in my life. I'm packed with tasks okay. What a life. But it's okay, I'm gonna do that and I'm gonna show Momma that her daughter can do it!
I've been really tired. I've thought about alot of things the last few days. My mind's exhausted. I'm sick of trying to find out things. Things that might hurt. I've been very confused. I don't know where I stand anymore. Some of things, I really can't tell anyone. But I need to let it out so badly. And I could do is to write it all out and tear more papers. I just feel so hollow, so empty. I don't know how to react to this shit. Not that I'm critisizing the believe but the fact that you have been brainwashed to do it all. Don't you get it? You were just being brainwashed. I hate you for that. I'm never going to forgive you for doing it again, just switching like this, and sending it off like this. I'm really dissapointed in you. You should not have gone that way. What's wrong with you? Don't you realised you've changed alot all this while?
And so I spent excessive amount of water escaping from my body through tears because I had been thinking too much. Way too much. I couldn't live my life being alone as it will lead to recalling things I should have done and the things that I should have treasured. Because time zoomed so fast that it made no time for me to realise what is worth done and treasured and soon, all of them would be leaving. Once upon a time, I have nice friends who eventually disappeared. Then I have a nice boyfriend who is now busy with his own stuff. So I say this is life. This life makes me barmier each day.
I don't wish to elaborate even more. I'm off.
