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Thursday, May 1, 2008

I don't get it. I don't seem to understand anything that happens in life. Everyday, I search for a reason, for why I'm sent here. For why I'm the only who everyone gives the least attention to. For why it seems like I'm the only who is going through a life that is obviously going downhill. I'm never a pessimist but I think I'm turning into one. I hate the way I am now. I miss being who I was. I'm just so torn apart so many times, I don't remember myself being extremely happy for the right reasons. I'm so caught up with everyday life, I never think about my future. I don't even like to think about my future. I don't like it when people ask me what I wanna be when I grow up, where I wanna go after my secondary school and what I wanna do for a living because i don't know what I want. I don't even want to decide what I want. I'd rather take what God has planned for me and just live life the way He wants me to. Fuck, why am I... nvm. Damn it, damn you atyra.

To be honest, it's kind of annoys me when people ask me whether I have a boyfriend or not. I mean, what if I do? What if I don't? Does it even matter? I know if I say yes, you would prolly see me as a bad influence, putting BGR before education, etc. I know if I say no, you would prolly think I'm lying and force me to say yes. Well, that's the reason why I don't bother to answer at all. People came up to me, asking me all these sorts of questions. I mean, like, come on, does it make a difference if I say yes/no? No, I don't think so. And it's like fcuking obvious that I do have one.

You know what, suddenly I miss, I miss, that person, that one who made my life like a roller coaster stucked at the top. The climax. That person who changed my life drastically. Really. And AHHH, I cannot believe it. I miss this person so badly. I need this person to motivate me to do well, because it has always been that way. And I need to see this person so badly. So random. This person is none other than my boyfy. End it fast. I want to be with you. It's hard for me to move on like this. I need you badly. I need you to be by my side always. I miss you so much. I can't convince you how much I miss you. You know that I can't stay without you for one minute! I feel I'm going to die without you if you don't come to me one day. I miss you, babat. Please end it fast.

Bye for now, readers!
I miss boyfy.





TIARA ATYRA

Welcome to Http://www.pynklover.blogspot.com

I'm TIARA ♥ and I'm pretty messed up.
I tend to make alot of mistakes.
And I like to keep things real.
Thank you.

TWENTY-ONE
09 june, 1992

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